What do you want to be? This is a question often asked to children as they grow up and progress through their school years and life experiences. The question is usually asked as what do you want to be (when you grow up)?
A few questions immediately come to mind when I hear this question, first how would a 10 year old have an idea of what he or she wants to be “when they grow up” when they don’t really even know what is available to them. My second question is how many “grown ups” really know what they want to be?
Here’s the bigger question, why is this usually defined by the job people decide to pursue? If you chose to be a doctor, lawyer, police officer, teacher, custodian, or burger flipper is that really who you are, or is it just what you do?
One more question, why do we not ask this question to adults? Do you know what you want to be? Do you define what you are by what you do to earn money? Does what someone does for a wage define what they are, or does someones character and value set define what they are. Is the person who decided to be a doctor more valuable than the person who decided to be cashier? What you decided to do is not what you are, it does not define your value versus what someone else decided to be.
So what do I want to be? Honest, reliable, kind, healthy, a good father, boyfriend, and friend. In short a good human being who cares about others.
What do I want to do? Now thats a whole other question.
Step 1, start. Doesn’t matter how you start, just start. If weight loss is the goal and you don’t know how to lose weight starting may be reaching out to a trainer or a nutritionalist, it can also be as simple as a 10 minute walk after dinner, or skipping the sugary coffee drink you pick up on the way to work.
The important thing is to do something, and keep in mind, the easier the first step is, the easier it will be to stick with and build upon. If you decide your first step is an hour of cardio followed by weight lifting and a 900 calorie diet I can pretty much assure you will fail.
In order to achieve long term success in your health and fitness you need to address the thought process that brought you to your current state of being. Trying to start a new diet plan and exercise program without addressing and correcting negative thoughts and behaviors will inevitably lead to failure; to have good physical health you need to have good mental health. All 3 areas are important to address, however your thoughts drive the entire experience and must be in order to lead you on the path to success.
The behavioral change process is based on self reflection through guided sessions where we find healthier thoughts to replace less than healthy thoughts which usually lead to less than healthy actions and a less than healthy life. You cannot control the thoughts that enter you mind but you can control your reactions to them and replace them with constructive helpful thoughts to move you onto a productive, healthy life.
All common sense and decency has left our society and what we have left is a division without compromise or empathy and a close mindedness unwilling to give on anything regardless of the greater good.
I have always been a strong supporter of law enforcement (almost to a fault at times) and tried to become a police officer but due to poor decisions when I was younger was unable to make that happen. Throughout my martial arts career I have trained many law enforcement members from the local level up to the federal level. With all this being said I will not hesitate to call out any law enforcement officer who crosses the line from enforcing the law to abuse of power and/or flat out breaking the laws they pledge to uphold. I believe the overwhelming majority of the law enforcement community are good people who chose this career for all the right reasons and I would never condemn the entire community based on the actions of a small percentage of bad actors within it.
For all the progress we have made it seems we have stepped back to a time where people are tired of being treated differently for the color of their skin, their religion, or anything else that makes them different from the majority. I constantly hear about the change that Dr Martin Luther King Jr was able bring and believe he has, however here we are 52 years after his death with many of the same issues.
Now in small towns and major cities throughout the United States we have protest and marches pretty much daily with the intention of bringing attention and ultimately change and full equality for all people. Unfortunately with protest comes the opportunist who will take advantage of a situation with bad intentions which cast a dark cloud on an entire movement. As descent people who care and empathize with the struggles some go through just for the skin color they were born with or the conditions they were born into or a variety of other situations and reasons we should support these protest and also want and fight for these changes for the good of our society as a whole.
Just like in the law enforcement community where the percentage of bad actors is small, the overwhelming majority of protesters fighting for equality for all are peaceful and they should not be grouped in with the bad actors. Protest needs to make people uncomfortable in order to effectively bring about change, while this may inconvenience some it’s not destructive or violent yet is often portrayed as so and in some cases met with force and violence.
All everyone wants is to be treated fairly regardless of race, gender, financial status, and whatever other categories we are separated by to keep the division. Im not really sure why this is such a hard concept for so many to grasp yet there are still so many who feel superior based on these classifications and continue to look down upon, suppress, and vilify those they feel are inferior, or think differently than they do.
Just like you don’t want to be grouped and/or categorized you shouldn’t group and/or categorize others. If you are going to call out someone you oppose, you should be willing to call out someone you support for the same offenses. It really doesn’t matter which side of the political isle you stand in, human decency should be paramount and people should come before politics. I would never condemn anyone for supporting a specific politician or party or ideology but if you venomously attack any who oppose you thats a different thing. We all have our own beliefs and values and this is good, however we all need to be respectful of each other and accept our differences.
It’s really quite simple: Be who you are and let others be who they are, and treat everyone the way you like to be treated.
Oh and by the way, you cant be a silent majority if you never shut the fuck up…..